I use humour when people come to me with their serious problems. Some people might think this isn’t appropriate. Sometimes it isn’t, so that’s when I use other methods. But mostly I use humour, because it works and it helps them.

I’m always 100% on their side, it’s totally confidential and if they don’t enjoy it and don’t think that I’ve helped them, I’ll give them their money back. You can’t say fairer than that and by the way, it has never happened.

So what‘s your problem?

My problem is explaining what I do, so people ‘get it’, straight off and that I’m being serious about not being serious.

So I usually say; “I help people that come to me with their problems, to enjoy their life more by talking to them and making them laugh”.

They look at me blankly and say; “So you’re a comedian?” Don’t people just love labels?

This is when I take a deep breath, dust off my best networking elevator pitch and say:

“Actually, my speciality is helping stressed executives that are struggling with work/life balance evidenced as stress or depression, or even a mid-life crisis where they’ve lost direction and don’t know what they want from life, possibly with addictions to prescription and/or recreational drugs, possibly have a problem with having too much or not any sex, that contact me directly or are referred to me by their doctor or Human Resources department, work or live within a forty mile radius of Leeds and have you ever tried the vanilla slices at Betty’s in Harrogate? ”

They then do one of two things, either; make a big show of recognising someone they know on the other side of the room and rush off or; whisper to me; “Actually I have a friend that has a terrible problem with … (whisper, whisper) could you help them?

I give the honest answer and say; “I don’t know, but here’s my card, why don’t you give me a ring”

If you are curious about why I do what I do, what I actually do and how I do it, then the answers are on the FAQs page.

So, what’ your problem? Please select from the list below.

If you haven’t got one here are a few suggestions that clients have come to me with:

(My apologies if you come across any terminology from psychology, medicine, psychiatry, therapy or counselling that you do not know, these have been used in error as I like everyone to follow what I’m saying and I hate it when people start to really live a label they’ve been given)

• Your life is not going the way you want it to.
• You feel you haven’t reached your potential yet, but are stuck.
• You are not living the life you expected and want to change it for a better one and don’t know where to start.
• You believe you are going crazy/nuts/bananas etc.
• You believe someone you care about is crazy/nuts/bananas and hope I can help.
• You can’t spell and/or type and are on my website by mistake, but you are just naturally curious (I’d like to help you, but not really my bag).
• You are stressed/depressed/having a mid-life crisis (Tick all or delete as appropriate).
• You get angry when you don’t want to.
• You cry when you don’t want to.
• It’s your party and you just don’t care about anything, anyone, anymore.
• You have noticed that you are either fatter or thinner than other people and are envious of them or worried you might die because of it (being obese or anorexic that is, not envy, but you never know you could be the first).
• You have a problem that nobody will help you with.
• You are a NLP (neuro linguistic programmer) practitioner that wants to steal my ideas (that’s fine, be my guest)
• You are confident that you are not confident. (NLPers will like that one)
• You can’t sleep and you really want to.
• You can’t sleep and think that’s brilliant because you get loads done until you can’t be arsed to get out of bed because there is no point anymore, at all, ever again.
• You can’t stop thinking about work/sex/your lack of sex or something or someone.
• You can’t understand why you have been asked to visit this site by someone because you know you are perfect and it’s everyone else that you come into contact with that have a problem.
• Once you start reading a list can’t stop and you’ve just got to finish it.
• Your problem is that you are not sure about whether I can help you with your problem.

If this last one is your problem, please email or ring me or we’ll both never know. (unless you are telepathic and …well, now you know)